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Tuesday, October 20, 2009

1. clowns are made to wear surgical masks over their faces when working
around monkeys to help prevent the spread of the clown enzyme that the
clown nose creates.

2. monkeys carry these sterile masks with them wherever they go. And
are handing them out to clowns at all times.

3. Clown suits are sort of like biohazard suits, meant to contain the
clown sickness.

4. Some clowns refuse to wear the masks, especially after they got into
the "dark funny" stage, and these clowns are punished. It is seen as a
threat to society to even hint at infecting a monkey.

5. There are sleeper cells of clowns that plot on infecting huge groups
of monkeys. They of coarse are executed in severe spectacles of
violence and death.

6. If a clown chops off a monkey's hand and makes a wish on it while it
is still twitching, that clown's wish will come true.

7. If your monkey baby becomes infected and turns into a clown baby,
and you want to donate the baby to the search for the cure
of "clowness" there are baby clown drop boxes all over the city.
Scientist monkeys will collect your baby clown and use their DNA to
help find an antidote.

8. Clown are all about the funny, but secretly are very jealous of
other clowns, and every laugh given to another clown is a punch to
their face. Insanely competitive with one another and always plotting
to out do each other. Professional jealousy.

9. Monkeys all get along just fine except when they are teenagers and
looking for dates, then there is a lot of beating chests and snarling,
but it never gets "throw down" violent.

10. A drunken monkey is one pathetic site to behold. All that
repression just spews out in a geyser of bitterness.

11. bonus - a popular dish for monkeys eating out are anthills on a
platter. It is like a fondue type thing.


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