Thinking about what happened. I want to explore this. Time, and life and where these things go. Where do my memories hide? Where was I when there are no memories of what had happened during the day.
I was off at 4:30. I went to bed at 10. What happened in between those times? I made a sandwich. Cooked dinner. That didn’t take 5 and a half hours. So where did they go?
Wait. I remember
I took Sarah to Starbucks and got an iced coffee. She got an iced tea. We ended up sitting in the car talking for an hour.
That was the bid deal yesterday. When your kids get older, they separate from you. The conversations become less encompassing. They used to tell you everything, every dream and fear. Every single random thought that popped into their heads. Then one day they stop, and it all becomes polite. They stick to safe subjects.
I know Sarah carries a lot on her shoulders. All A student and color guard and role model to her brother and sister. Always patient and never complains. So where does IT go? She gets headaches and stomachaches. Thank God she keeps a journal. All those stresses need to go somewhere.
We talked about anxiety, depression, mania, my three amigos. I told her that she had won the genetic jackpot and if she ever needs to talk to someone, better to do that than suffer in silence.
So that was where the hours went. I just had to sit calmly for a moment for it to come back.
Oh, that was something else I told her.
When you get older, being alone and still with your thoughts is too terrifying for people. They would do anything to prevent it from happening. Whole chunks of the economy are based on keeping yourself away from yourself.
Just your typical father-daughter chat.
FIGHT EVIL
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